I look at making music as kinda like making movies.
There are different styles of making music, just as there are different styles of filmmaking.
Some bands are very dictatorial, with one or two people in charge.
I have always hated that and avoided it like the plague.
Frank Zappa was like that.
So was Captain Beefheart.
If a band were a film crew, both were the writer, director, and producer of their band.
The rest of their group would be the cast and crew.
They would compose the music alone, then hand it off to their band, who would play it exactly as it was written.
I always tried to be more democratic than that, involving everybody in the process, through the whole thing.
I am terribly uncomfortable in a leadership role.
But, that is not a very efficient method.
People get frustrated by it and leave.
After years of trial-and-error, I think the best approach to operating as a group is to be a “benign dictatorship” of sorts.
Someone has to have an idea of where they are going or the whole thing will drift apart.
They also have to leave a lot of wiggle-room for others to work with.
I try to look for ideas from the world of filmmaking, when it is applicable.
I think my biggest problem is the lack of social skills.
I don’t read people or situations very well.
I don’t communicate what I am thinking very well, either, it seems.
So, if I want to do anything at all, it seems like the best approach for me is just working alone (for the most part) with some occasional collaboration with friends.
This really sucks.
Part of the reason I make music is to overcome anxiety, depression, and have some sort of social life.
I don’t really participate in much else, besides music.
But, it seems like having a real band is going to always be out of reach for me.